It was last Saturday that I had a life-changing epiphany. That is, if I believed in life-changing epiphanies.
I was watching two guys facing each other, one dagger in each hand. One guy attacked.
His dagger swiftly moved through the air. When it got deflected, the other dagger immediately followed, aiming straight for the other person…
That’s when I was thinking to myself: “Huh, that actually looks impressive.”
I realize that that probably makes my life sound a lot more interesting than it is so I should probably offer some context. I live in an American suburb. I’ve been married for the better part of a decade… to the same person. I work from home which means I essentially live in lounge wear.
And sometimes, I go to Martial Arts (in lounge wear) where I spend a lot of time being aware of the various ways in which I suck at punching or kicking or, well, using daggers. Unless you study Martial Arts (or maybe even if you study with a trainer who is less into constructive criticism than mine), you might not be aware of how many things you do wrong sub-optimally while practicing something as seemingly simple as throwing a jab.
Thanks to constructive criticism, I no longer have that privilege. I’m a least theoretically aware of some of the things I’m doing wrong. Hence, being aware of the various ways in which I suck at punching or kicking, or well, using daggers.
And yet, here I was, one dagger in each hand, realizing that even being able to do a practice that involves double-handed dagger work is actually pretty impressive. My past self who first walked into that class a few years ago couldn’t have done it.
If you grabbed a random person from the street, they couldn’t do it, either. (Probably. If they could do it, you would have an issue. With a pissed off stranger. Who has two daggers. Anyway, I digress.)
The point of my story is this: we often spend so much time focusing on the ways we are not where we want to be. At least I do. I don’t think I’m the only one?
When we focus on how we fall short, we miss something important: even sucking at something—like training with two daggers, or playing the guitar, or writing poetry or starting a business or whatever floats your boat—is an achievement.
And that’s worthy of acknowledgement and celebration.
Which is why I’m happy to present my latest offering: The “Even Sucking at Something Is an Achievement Annual Review.”
To my awareness, this is an entirely unique offering. Gee, I really wonder why?
On second thought, I think I’ll rename my offering into “From Perfectionism to Appreciation: Your 2023 Review”… If that interests you, you can book it here (use the code “appreciation” for a 25% discount until Dec 13).
During this unique coaching session, we will look at your 2023 through a lens that’s antithetical to our culture but very supportive of your joyful growth in the coming year(s): that every seed you have planted, and every action you have taken is worthy of celebration.
That doing something you want to do in a clumsy way is infinitely better than not doing it at all.
And that it’s worth it to take more risks and being yourself (like what I’m trying to do with this email).
If that speaks to you, I would be absolutely honored to work with you.
Warmly,
Bere
P.S.: If you want, you can still order the “Even Sucking at Something Is an Achievement Annual Review” for your least favorite relative. Just hit reply to this email and I’ll get them set up with a session they won’t ever forget. (This is a joke. I think.)
P.P.S.: Here’s the code again: “appreciation” (valid until December 13).
Love this perspective! As a new writer who is often self-critical, this is important to keep in mind!