"Be wine, my friend"
Don’t get one-upped by a squeezed-out grape!
Hi friend,
Once a week, I tidy up my electronic files.
When I did this today, I came across a document where I described all the problems I was dealing with in 2016.
The contrast between now and then shocked me.
You see, my last few months have been extremely challenging. Here are just some of the things that made it that way:
a hospital stay for a loved one (thankfully nothing major),
a hospital stay and a scary health diagnosis for another loved one,
the loss of our support network for childcare,
the political situation, and
my husband’s a federal worker in the US (enough said…).
Oh, and our toddler is very energetic, even by the insane standards of toddlers (who are essentially perpetual motion machines.)
Even with all that going on, my life is still so much better now than it was 9 years ago.
Here’s what this has taught me:
1. Focus on what you can improve
9 years ago, at least some of my problems were internal.
Today, almost all the challenges I’m dealing with are external (other people’s health, the political situation, etc.).
We can’t control the external, but we can do a lot to improve our internal reality. And that’s what improves our lives.
2. Personal growth pays off big time
That my life is so much better now is the result of my obsession with personal growth.
As I have continued to grow and relentlessly looked for solutions to issues, many of my problems have simply disappeared.
If you want to have a good life, focus on personal growth.
3. Be like wine
Bruce Lee has this amazing quote:
“Empty your mind.
Be formless, shapeless, like water. […]
Now water can flow, or it can crash.
Be water, my friend.”
My Martial Arts trainer got trained by Bruce Lee’s former training partner. Seeing the impact Bruce Lee has had on those around him tells me how special he must have been. So, I have immense appreciation for him.
That said, perhaps it’s time we turn water into (red) wine?
Here’s my advice for living a great life:
“Wine gets better every year. Be wine, my friend.”
It makes me really sad when people think the best days are behind them. What if our best days are in front of us? What if life could continue to get better and better?
Many wines get better with age… don’t get one-upped by a squeezed-out grape!
Warmly,
Louise
Want support to focus on what you can improve? 🤗
If you would like my support to improve your life, I have a lot of options:
Recorded workshops for paid subscribers: learn how to tap into your clarity and courage, flourish with your future self, and deal with the messiness of (spiritual) relationships
Group coaching: you can join my soulful productivity club (try before you join: your first meeting is complimentary)
Individual coaching: more information here.
Bonus:
If you want to be like wine, you can use the image below as your vision board. Just be prepared to explain yourself to everyone who sees it:
“I don’t get it, do you want to own a vineyard?”
“No, I want to be like wine!”
“So — you want to be able to get people intoxicated?”
“Forget it!” (stomps away in frustration)
Thank you, Dr. Louise. I've always loved the Bruce Lee quote, and have pondered it many times. In my view, this encapsulates his philosophy on adaptability, fluidity, and openness in both martial arts and life.
At its core, he's advocating for a flexible and responsive mindset rather than one that is rigid and unyielding. Water takes the shape of whatever it enters—it flows when necessary and crashes when needed. This mirrors the ideal approach to challenges: rather than resisting change, we should embrace it and move with it, adjusting as required.
In martial arts, this means not sticking to a single, predictable form but rather adapting to your opponent, the situation, and the moment. In life, it suggests that instead of clinging to fixed beliefs or rigid structures, we should stay open, adaptable, and capable of responding to whatever comes our way.
It’s also deeply rooted in Taoist philosophy, where water is often used as a metaphor for effortless power, humility, and persistence. It doesn’t force its way—it finds a way!